The Body Language Of A Cheating Spouse
What does body language have to do with infidelity? Well, lying to your spouse is one of the top signs of infidelity. It isn’t possible for someone to cheat without lying to their partner, and a persons’ body can give you really good indicators that they are lying to you. Body language is a form of communication consisting of gestures, eye movements, body poses, tones of voice, and speech rate. We send and interpret these signs unconsciously and much of our communication is nonverbal. These signs can give you a look at your spouses’ current state of mind. However, remember that these aren’t hard and fast rules, merely indicators that something may be amiss in your relationship. These body language signs will not fit all cultures, for instance in some cultures it is a sign of disrespect to hold eye contact. They won’t fit all types of people, some people just have quirks and ticks that are unique to them. What is key is to know your subject, the more that you know your partner the easier it will be for you to spot oddities in their body language. Hence, these signs will be more useful to spouses and those in long term relationships. *Avoids eye contact - Liars will consecutively look at you and look away a number of times. *Too much eye contact - A seasoned liar will know that they should maintain eye contact, in the effort to do this however they will stare a bit more than is natural. *Looking to the side - Often a body language sign of guilt. *TIP* When you ask someone a question watch their eyes closely to see which direction that they look. If they look to the right (right-handed people) they are recalling a memory, telling the truth. If instead they look to the left, they are telling a lie. This is the exact opposite for the left handed. People will also look up when recalling a memory (left or right-handed) *Touching their face, throat and mouth - Another body language sign is touching or scratching the nose or behind their ear they touch earlobes or behind their ear. *They give too much information when asked a simple question *Repeating the question you asked in their responseLiars often use your words to make an answer and do this for example: When asked “did you have sex with her” response: “no, I did not have sex with her.” *TIP* A statement with a contraction is more likely to be truthful. “I didn’t do it” instead of “I did not do it.” *Watch the face - A persons’ face will often give a quick involuntary twitch when something happens that irritates, excites or amuses them. *They stutter or stumble upon words *Tremble in voice *Facial expression doesn’t match statements - Such as frowning when saying “I love you.” *Shaking hands *Indirect statements - Liars will often avoid lying by implying answers rather than answering directly.For example: “Have you been cheating?” Answer: “Why would I be cheating?” *Talking faster than normal *You hear a lot of: um, err, ah etc. *They are flush *Body position - A liar is uncomfortable facing their accuser and may turn their head or body away. *TIP* A liar will often attempt to place something in between them and their accuser. This can be a hand over a vulnerable body part such as the neck, mouth or eyes. Or it can be an actual physical item such as a desk, book, or table. Always try to confront your partner head on where you get a good look at their body language. Don't question them while they are not doing another activity. *Touching hair - If they are playing or fiddling with their hair they may be feeling self-conscious or uncomfortable. *Biting the lip- They may be anticipating something or holding back *Foot movement - Tapping feet, shifting weight around often is a sign that a person is excited nervous or scared. *Flinching from contact *Defensive - The guilty will often be defensive, the innocent will go on the offensive. Obviously, just because someone exhibits one or many of these signs doesn’t make them a liar or a cheater. The above behaviors should be compared to a persons normal behavior whenever possible. Most lie detecting experts agree that a combination of body language and other cues must be used to make an educated guess on whether someone is telling the truth or a lie.
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